The Wrongful Reflection

Most people had posed this question to themselves at any given point in their lives. 

“What’s wrong with me?”

Evidently and scientifically speaking, we are created almost the same. Our internal organs are at their proper places – unless you’re a medical miracle or anomaly. We breathe the same way. We fart the same way. Yada . . . yada . . . yada . . .

charlie brown

But how come we ask this terribly self-criticizing question as if our self-worth had just plummeted down the drain? It questions everything that we stand for, slightly touching on an existential topic of “what’s our purpose” and “why are we created”. This question breeds anxiety. Also, this path of thinking leads to loads of other crappy stuff we don’t really need in our lives in order to embrace happiness . . . in order to feel good about ourselves . . . in order to live a fulfilling life. This question kills off all possibility of ever looking towards a bright future.

Your life is in your hands. You are the master of your own fate.

I cannot stress that enough without sounding like a broken record, but it is true.

If you allow external deterrents into your life and be led by some insane idea that you have “no choice” in whatever you do, then, you do yourself a disservice. There is ALWAYS a choice and deciding on which one to take using the perfect marriage of two of those important part of yourself – the heart and the mind – will bring you to a place where the question, “What is wrong with me?” has no place in. Because there is nothing wrong with people in general. It is the extrinsic things added with fears that makes all the problems.  Marginalizing both will create a place where the SELF has worth and has value.

There is another truth that I recently encountered that somehow resonated through me for years but it’s only now that I can succinctly verbalize it in a way that makes sense. It goes like this . . .

“One cannot do anything about the past since it’s already done. The future is still uncertain because there are too many possibilities for it before it can come to pass. The present is the only point in time that can be controlled and shaped the way you want it to.”

This truth has saved me more times than I can count, especially when I unconsciously fall into a place where I am being harsh to myself or think that I can’t do anything right. This truth has shown me that everything I do is worth something even if it’s not a billion-dollar idea.

So whenever I feel like questioning myself, asking “What’s wrong with me?” I stomp an imaginary foot, make myself stop from lingering in that negative notion and think those truths I’ve imparted.

Then, I think of happy thoughts. Peter Pan dispensed a good self-relaxing advice, you know. I may not have pixie dust, but after thinking of happy thoughts, I can definitely feel that I can fly. No more self-doubt. No more comparing to other people. No envy. No jealousy. And most of all . . . no more drama.

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